My 42nd Birthday and Happy Fathers Day

Mama's Dress

This was a dress I bought with Bak at Sungei Wang Plaza way back in 1994 when we were in Ausmat. Now you can wear it already.

Mama's trip to Jakarta - Year 1982

I was 7 years old then.

5 February 2016 - A year ++ ago....

This used to be my view every day while I wait for you to finish school.

Masjid TTDI

The library!!

I can't believe it has been a year plus since we moved. I took these photos when we were so ready to move but I was feeling sad about leaving some of the places that I frequent every day.

Kisses before solat

You don't like my kisses but I always kiss you anyway.

One year on...

29/3/17

Its been a year already since we moved to symphony hills. Feels so fast. So many things happened this past year. We had so many gatherings and people staying over in this past year compared to our whole 11 years in Kota Damansara! 

Its been a tough start for 2017 though. I just hope and pray things will get better.

29 March 2016 - Our first night sleeping in our new house.

30 March 2016 - Our first day after officially sleeping in our new house.

One year later...

I remembered the date but I forgot to take a proper photo for the anniversary. By the time I remembered, you guys were already asleep. Well, we didn't take any beautiful photos on our first day in our new beautiful home last year anyway because everything was a mess, and we were so busy and tired. It is amazing when I think back on what we have accomplished this past year. I can't believe that we actually did it especially with all our stuff. The packing and the unpacking. It was just crazy haha Alhamdulillah, we survived. I just pray and doa that this house will be a blessing for our family. May we grow strong together and happy together. May we be protected from any outside interferences. May we blessed with rezeki. Ya Allah, please protect and keep us safe. 

Sometime Being an Adult sucks....

Marriage....

....it's tough some of the times, challenging and requires hard work and compromise and lots of give and take. Sometimes I just don't want to adult.

A gorgeous view

Everyday we have this view and I think to myself- what a difference from last year and how thankful and grateful I am for this. Sometimes I still feel that it's surreal. Sometimes I feel guilty and think what did I do to deserve this but then I am just so thankful and I just pray that Allah continues to give us His blessings and to keep us safe, fit, healthy and happy together and dimurahkan rezeki always. Amin Amin ya Rabbal Alamin

This is your Mother at 40

Wen, one day you will reach 40 years of age and you will see that 40 is not old at all. :) This was at the Ritz Carlton Hotel in Singapore - 14th and 15th April 2016.

Broken heart

O Allah, please heal and mend my broken heart. The one who broke it doesn't know that he broke it. He hurt me. He was mean and I didn't think I deserved it. Of course he does think that I deserved it. He always thinks that he is right. All the time. He thinks he know best. He thinks he knows it all. He thinks that he changed for the better and that the fact that I didn't change goes to show that I haven't grown. Well if he means that being easily offended by a simple question of "We are going to dinner right...??" is growth, then I am in trouble.

I don't know what he wants from me. Not too long ago, he told me "Don't complain..don't assume..." - now that I have stopped doing that he goes back and say.."Complain!! ( re the house defects to the developer ok yes but it is still complaints!! and then the other day he didn't tell me that we are heading to Aeon and when we had a fight as a result of it he said " I made the u turn, you should already know that we were heading to Aeon!" Really? Now you want me to assume? I give up. I am now married to a sensitive old man who doesn't have fun with the wife anymore.

Well, in his defence, he provides well for us. I am grateful for that really. Then I guess next in line is his exercise because he needs to lose weight. Between work and his exercise routine and the exercise routine he has Arwen on, there isn't much time for anything else. Not much time for the wife especially.

Oh and another thing he says " I am reactionary..I react to how you act" ..Really? Then, what am I? A robot? You think I don't react to how you act? You come home and you are quiet because apparently you don't want to tell me what a heavy responsibility you have to do at work in order to earn a living for us because you don't want me to worry. Oh how sweet. Instead you decide to keep quiet and sit in front of the telly and then expects me to talk to you so you can react to me. What a load of crap. So I can't react to how silent and grumpy you look and decide maybe I should stay away. For self -preservation, more than anything else really.

So that' is where I am right now. In self-preservation mode since whatever I could say might explode a time bomb.

I know this is a blog for you Wen but yeah you might want to know when you are all grown up that sometimes marriage sucks and it takes a lot, a lot of compromise and a hell lot of hard work.

Letting go of stuff -Feb-March 2016

It's not easy for me to let go of stuff but at the same time I know it's just stuff. It's weighing me down and cluttering up my house. So with the big move coming up, it pushes me out of my comfort zone and forces me to let go of a lot of things!!

I just took out all your baby clothes and your pram and I gave them away after keeping them for 10 years!! I was keeping them for your sibling but fate would have it that I won't be having any baby after you. After the miscarriage and after years of trying, i just could not bring myself to look at your baby stuff but now I have and I have let go most of it! I gave your pram to Atlas when he came here last month. Your pram is now in Krabi! Some clothes I gave away to Azra and Alisya and some was donated. I still keep some of the nicer clothes, the jogger pram and your baby high chair are still here with us!!

Here are the pictures of all that I gave away.

8 February 2016 CNY Holiday

We went to the Curve/Ikea/Tesco. We looked for a suitable dress for the upcoming Uncle Amir's kenduri.

Later in the evening we went to Symphony Hills to check on the new house.